Discourse on Youth Violence in America:

A Love Story

 

 

Characters:     The Narrator- female. Dark. Cynical. Gifted public speaker.

(The rest of the parts will be played by a cast of 5-6 actors of flexible gender):

Boy

Girl

Jock

Jock 2

Cheerleader

Counselor

Dean

Evangelist

College student

Mother with Child

Man with Eyepatch

 

Setting:       The stage, and various other locations provided by the audience’s imagination

 

Time:          Nowish  

 

Synopsis:      A Player Queen of sorts and her troupe of versatile, if occasionally mutinous, actors present the audience with what appears to be a treatise on youth violence, bringing together in theatrical form the various opinions and theories that are commonly expressed on the subject.

 

Amid this heavy-handed lecture, a love story takes shape, only to be crushed by a world that traps us between cynicism and stupidity.


(Lights come up on a young woman in a cheerleader’s uniform. She is excessively perky as she attempts to whip the audience into a frenzy of highschool spirit.)

 

CHEERLEADER

Do you guys have Spartan spirit? Then let’s hear you shout it out!... Gooooooooo Spartans! Wooooo! C’mon guys! I can’t hear you! Spartans woooooo!

 

(She claps rhythmically as she begins her cheer.)

 

Spartan Spirit. Spartan pride.

Let’s hear it for the winning side.

Score that point. Make that play.

Spartans! Spartans! Yay yay yay!

 

We’re never gonna beat Valley with that attitude! Let’s hear some spirit! Woooooo!

 

Go you Spartans. You’re the best.

Spartans better than the rest!

Fight to win. Shoot to kill.

Bend them to our Spartan will!

Gooooooo Spartans! Yeah!

 

With Spartan men on the attack

The other team should watch its back

Fight on Spartans, as you must.

Grind our enemy to dust!

Goooooooooo Spartans!

 

C’mon you guys! Let’s show Valley what kind of enthusiasm Andrew Jackson Highschool has! Wooooo!

 

Annihilate the other guys

Those evil rats whom we despise

Mangled by our victory

And left to die in agony!

Gooooooooo Spartans! Yeah!

 

Spartans! Spartans! Hike Hike Hike!

Roast their heads upon a pike.

Break their bones! Bash their heads!

Rip their genitals to shreds!

Goooooooo Spartans! Woo!

 

Spartan fight song note by note

Stick their eyeballs down their throats


Snap their ribs! Stab their–

 

(A shot rings out. The cheerleader drops to the ground. The narrator strolls confidently onto the stage. She wears a black trenchcoat and smokes a cigarette. She notices the audience’s reaction to the cheerleader.)

 

NARRATOR

What are you all looking at? (pretends to notice the cheerleader) Oh. The dead cheerleader. You don’t think I had anything to do with this, I hope. Hell, she’s not even really dead. (Cheerleader pops back to life) Take a bow, sweetie. (Cheerleader takes a bow and bounces offstage, when she has gone...) See? Nothing to worry about. Hello and welcome to “Discourse on Youth Violence in America.” I will be your humble narrator this evening. Before we begin, I’d first like to introduce to you our company. (Cast bounds out onto the stage in their blacks) For those of you unfamiliar with the conventions of the theatre, these 6 young men and women will be in charge of telling you a story tonight. They will pretend to be people who they are not, adopting such costume pieces and physical characteristics as the role might demand. Now, at this point I am obligated to warn you that this show does contain frank and often graphic discussions of violent situations. Alas, such vulgarity cannot be avoided if we are to confront head-on a very real social epidemic that divides and cripples our nation. Tonight is our opportunity to examine the amoral and antisocial elements in our society and to think critically about what might be at the root of this terrifying evil.

 

PLAYER 1

Video games!

 

PLAYER 2

(overlapping) Parents!

 

PLAYER 3

(overlapping) Guns!

 

PLAYER 4

(overlapping) Chemical imbalance!

 

PLAYER 5

(overlapping) Rap music!

 

PLAYER 6

(overlapping) Nietzsche!

 

(pause. Narrator gives them a look)

 

PLAYER 1

(as if the narrator might not have heard her) Video games!

 


NARRATOR

Well, you may have to put just a little bit of thought into it.

 

(Players 1 through 4 exit. Players 5, Boy, and 6, Girl, remain on opposite sides of the stage, with the narrator in the center.)

 

NARRATOR

Behold: two young people. They could be your children. Or yours. Neither one is even old enough to buy cigarettes. Yet inside their souls lurks the potential for monstrous and profound evil. Observe the tragic fate of these two lovers and find therein the tragic fate of a generation. But enough talk! Let our play begin. Scene one is entitled, “Boy meets Girl.”

 

(Lights crossfade. The Narrator retreats to watch the scene. Boy and Girl look at each other. Slowly, they begin to walk towards each other. Before they can meet, however, Cheerleader and Jock both enter and walk between them. Boy and Girl both back up.)

 

CHEERLEADER

You are so mean! Stop it!

 

JOCK

Ah, c’mon, Tracy. I’m just playin’.

 

CHEERLEADER

(flirting) You are such a jerk.

 

JOCK

(also flirting) I’m just sympathizing. It must be rough to be so air-headed.

 

CHEERLEADER

(false shock) You are so mean!

 

JOCK

I’d rather be mean than a skanky ‘ho like you.

 

CHEERLEADER

(pouting) Shut up! I am not!

 

JOCK

You sure are. You have sex for money don’t you?

 

CHEERLEADER

That’s not true! Stop being such a jerk.

 

JOCK

Dirty whore. Cheap slut.


CHEERLEADER

(slapping his arm, still flirting) Stop it!

 

JOCK

Stupid empty-headed bitch.

 

CHEERLEADER

(giggling) You’re stupid!

 

JOCK

I oughtta slap your stupid bitch face. Worthless sack of human garbage.

 

CHEERLEADER

(pouting) I’m never speaking to you again, Billy.

 

JOCK

Aw. I’m sorry, Tracy. You wanna go do something later?

 

CHEERLEADER

Call me.

 

(Cheerleader bounces of stage. Jock smirks and follows after her. When they have left, Boy approaches Girl.)

 

BOY

Hi. My name’s–

 

GIRL

Get the hell away from me.

 

(She hurries offstage. Boy watches her go, sadly. He turns and exits. Lights crossfade.)

 

NARRATOR

Well, these budding romances take time. Let’s take a break and ask local teens what they think of (dramatically) youth violence.

 

PLAYER 3

Well, I think the first thing we have to ask ourselves is where were the parents in all this? I mean, to be a good parent you have to be involved in your child’s life.

 

PLAYER 1

Parents need to be doing their jobs. Just plopping your kid down in front of the television is no substitute. And think about all the stuff that kid is exposed to. I heard that the average American child is exposed to 100 billion murders on tv every single day. That’s a fact. And these kids are like listening to Marvelous Manson who is telling them to go out and worship Satan.

 


PLAYER 2

What everybody fails to realize is that we are living in a mass-media society. The media dominates all the media that we see, societally speaking. Every single media that we media is controlled by our society’s media. It all depends on the media within a society.

 

PLAYER 1

Just look at the society that we live in! It’s turned people into like consumerized zombies. I mean, look at it. This society, with its media and its internets, it’s just filling people up with consumerism.

 

PLAYER 4

I think it’s stupid to say it’s movies and stuff. I mean, I watched violent movies when I was a kid and I never went out and shot any of my classmates. They’re only dangerous if they’re being watched by kids who are like screwed up in the first place. It’s like the anti-social element in our society.

 

(Narrator lets out a theatrical gasp.)

 

NARRATOR

You dare to speak the name of the anti-social element? Leave this place!

 

(Players 1 through 4 break character somewhat, confused. Narrator indicates that they should exit, and they awkwardly comply)

 

NARRATOR

(to audience) There is no doubt in my mind, ladies and gentlemen, that we do indeed live in a society that promotes amorality tolerates evil. I also have no doubt that you all consider yourselves integral partners in the unity of purpose that binds this great nation. For you realize that if we all stand strong together, there’s no reason we can’t turn the tide of this toxic culture with certain, basic, agreed upon sets of– (Boy enters.) But wait, my friends! Who’s this character? (Boy looks behind him to see to whom the narrator is referring) Surely you recognize him. (Boy points to himself: “Me?”) A sullen, disdainful countenance upon his face. Dark, shifty eyes never meeting your glance. (Boy listens carefully, taking in all this new information about himself) What’s he plotting in that closed, aloof imagination of his? He goes to school everyday, yes he does. Taking classes alongside your children. And yours. And yours. But he’s not like them. Oh no. He’s a loner. An outcast. While your children are out playing clean, healthy American sports and taking their sweethearts out for frosty chocolate malts, he sits at home, in a dark room, fiddling with his internets. No doubt hackering into all of your secret, private informations that the government’s been turning into internets without your even knowing about it! Violent video games and perverse pornography are slowly warping and twisting his mind into a cold, inhuman vessel for the most cruel and destructive of intentions. He is a creature out of your darkest nightmares. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you: Your anti-social element!

 

(Boy looks around, clears his voice for big performance. Pause.)

 


BOY

(falsetto) Why don’t nice girls like me?

 

NARRATOR

(interrupting) No no no! Try again.

 

BOY

(much lower) Everything’s so fucking stupid.

 

NARRATOR

Oo Better. I especially like the profanity.

 

BOY

(dark, resentful, brooding) Everyone around me is so fake and shallow. I hate my life. Nobody at school but those stupid bullying jocks and vapid giggling girls. When I take over the world, I’m going to have them all killed. They’ll be sorry that–

 

NARRATOR

(interrupting) Stop stop stop. I’m not believing it.

 

BOY

(breaking character) What?

 

NARRATOR

I’m not believing it. It’s too much.

 

BOY

You want me to pull it back?

 

NARRATOR

Well, you’ve obviously never heard of playing opposites.

 

BOY

Opposites?

 

NARRATOR

It’s a key part of acting. If you want to play sad, you should actually play happy. If you want to be cold, pretend to be warm. If you need to be hungry, act as if you’ve just eaten a huge meal. It’s the simplest thing.

 

(Boy looks incredulous but gives it a shot)

 

BOY

(smiling slightly, chuckling) This big stupid ape called me a faggot on the bus the other day.

 


NARRATOR

more.

 

BOY

(grinning broadly) In my mind, I saw myself hitting him in the face with a huge sledgehammer. Right in the middle of his face. I could see it crumbling inward, you know, as if it were made of clay.

 

NARRATOR

Getting there. What about gym class. I’ll bet you love that.

 

BOY

(beginning to do a little dance) Oh ho! I’d like to take Mr. Archibald’s whistle and shove it right down his throat. Then I’d ram an icepick through his kneecaps. Tra la la.

 

(Narrator places a festive lei around Boy’s neck)

 

BOY

(now really getting into it, giddy) No one understands me and no one ever will! Ha ha! My life is so utterly empty and lonely sometimes I just want to end it all and take everyone I can with me!

 

(Girl enters, writing something in a notebook. Boy freezes and watches her as she passes.)

 

BOY

(taking off the lei) Hey.

 

GIRL

(without looking up) Hi.

 

(pause. Girl sits down as far as she can possibly get from Boy and continues writing.)

 

BOY

Whatcha writing?

 

GIRL

Something private.

 

BOY

(nodding eagerly) Cool.

 

(No reply. Boy winces and looks as if he’d like to claw his tongue out. He stands awkwardly, looking for something to say.)

 

BOY

You’re in my English class, right?

 


GIRL

(still not looking up) You’re very perceptive. (Exits)

 

(Boy awkwardly exits. Lights crossfade back to narrator.)

 

NARRATOR

A ticking timebomb waiting to explode! Ladies and gentlemen, I don’t wish to alarm you, but this boy may already be a lost cause. Maybe his antisocial tendencies will erupt in violence. Maybe they won’t. But either way, he may always be a dangerous, threatening element. The real question, my friends, is how we can prevent such personalities from forming in the first place. Luckily, Discourse on Youth Violence in America has assembled a panel of experts to discuss the roots of this social disease and paths to finding a cure.

 

(Players 1 through 4 wear eyeglasses to indicate that they are “experts.”)

 

EXPERT 1

(in a German accent) Behaviors aquired in childhood can have profound effects on later development. Therefore, violence must be targeted at an early age. Children develop social habits relatively early on in development, and any attempt to steer socialization must begin from the ground up.

 

EXPERT 2

Individuals and peer groups that identify themselves as existing apart and in opposition to other youth peer groups and the community at large lie at the core of this problem. Hostility towards the community must not be allowed to grow in the hearts of our nation’s youth.

 

PLAYER 3

 If children do not learn to think of themselves as belonging to a group that includes, at some level, a broad section of their peers, all is lost. Through activities that promote peer unity and identification with the community, we can hope to foster healthier group dynamics.

 

PLAYER 4

...Pamphlets and posters, effectively disseminated in the schools, can have a really positive effect. I’m thinking things along the lines of: “Don’t Leave Anyone Out,” “We Are All Us,” “Unity is Strength,” or simply “Join.”

 

PLAYER 2

School assemblies! For years they’ve been a cornerstone of organized socialization efforts. And I for one believe they still can be.

 

PLAYER 1

Not only do assemblies gather your student body together in a very literal, tangible way, didactic performances can be designed that promote nonviolent behavior and stress the importance of belonging to the larger social group.

 


PLAYER 3

Whether or not frequent and prolonged exposure to assemblies has any measurable effect, research indicates that these delightful excursions from the monotony of everyday academic life are unlikely to do any serious harm. I mean, who doesn’t like assemblies, right?

 

PLAYER 4

Key messages to promote: we all belong to the same group, and our group does not use violence to solve our problems. It may also be helpful to give children another group to vent their hostilities towards. Possible enemies include dragons, people who waste electricity and tooth decay.

 

PLAYER 1

If we make schools fully accountable for a socialization process that includes an emphasis on constructive group... behavior...

 

(Player 2's train of thought is interrupted as Boy walks through his light.)

 

PLAYER 2

...We can-

 

Everyone else:

Shhh!

 

(Lights crossfade. Girl enters from behind. She calls out to Boy.)

 

GIRL

Hey, wait!

 

BOY

(turning around, hiding his surprise admirably) Oh. Hi.

 

GIRL

I liked your story today in class.

 

BOY

Oh. Thanks. Mrs. McGovern didn’t. I have to go see the counselor this afternoon.

 

GIRL

(with a derisive grunt) That’s ridiculous! The juxtaposition of the pastoral imagery and the serial killer motif was brilliant. Clearly, an attempt at defamiliarization of the genre.

 

BOY

Yeah. Trevor and I thought it’d be funny.

 

GIRL


Well, it was. (pause) It’s not everyday you see someone with the courage to go against the flow like that, Todd.

 

BOY

Well, actually, my name’s–

 

GIRL

You’re different somehow, Todd. There’s something about you I find very intriguing.

 

(pause. Boy glances behind him, then at his watch.)

 

BOY

We should keep moving. The assembly’s about to start.

 

GIRL

Bah! What an idiotic waste of time! You go to those things?

 

BOY

No!... Well, I mean, I wouldn’t if we weren’t forced to.

 

GIRL

Oh, come on, Todd. They can’t possibly keep track of every single student. I just hide out under the bleachers and have a smoke while all the rest of these zombies get to crowd into a stuffy auditorium and listen to some prick preach about gonorrhea.

 

BOY

It’s drunk driving today, I think.

 

(She gets a cigarette out of her pocket and puts it in her mouth as she turns to leave.)

 

GIRL

You coming?

 

(Boy is frozen. Finally, he nods. They exit together. The narrator returns to center.)

 

NARRATOR

Oh sure. It looks cute. But any story built on a foundation of deviancy can only end badly! You wait and see.

 

(She pauses a moment, then pulls a cigarette out of her coat. Lights crossfade, and Counselor enters. Her manner is effortfully mild, as if coaxing a vicious animal.)

 

COUNSELOR

Come in.

 


(Boy enters.)

 

COUNSELOR

Welcome.

 

BOY

Hi.

 

COUNSELOR

Have seat. Would you like a Tootsie Pop?

 

BOY

(shaking his head, quietly) No thanks.

 

(There is a long pause while Counselor nods understandingly at Boy, and Boy stares awkwardly at the ground.)

 

COUNSELOR

How’s school going? Is everything alright?

 

BOY

Yeah. I guess.

 

COUNSELOR

You guess?

 

BOY

I mean, “Yeah.”

 

COUNSELOR

(nodding) Uh huh? That’s good.

 

(She makes a note of something.)

 

COUNSELOR

I read your story. Was there any reason you decided to write about that particular... topic?

 

(Boy shrugs. Counselor reacts as if he has just given a highly articulate verbal response.)

 

COUNSELOR

(nodding) Uh huh. Uh huh. Yeah... I see. Are you doing any drugs?

 

BOY

No.

 


COUNSELOR

Well would you like to start? I could prescribe some Prexidone, some Seditron, some Posivex?...

 

(Dean of Students enters.)

 

DEAN

Excuse me, Ms. Heisman, could I see the student for a moment?

 

(Boy looks concerned.)

 

COUNSELOR

Of course. We can continue our talk another time.

 

(Dean motions, and Boy follows.)

 

DEAN

(as they exit together) We missed you at the assembly today.

 

(Boy pales. Lights crossfade.)

 

NARRATOR

(looking at a newspaper, shaking her head) It seems that every single time you open a newspaper, you find out that there’s been another school shooting. (flips through pages, hoping to find one) Or if not a school shooting, something bad of some kind is happening at any rate. (tosses newspaper carelessly over her shoulder) The point is: we live in dark times, my friends. What has made our age so distinctly vicious? So cold and unwholesome that little children are for the first time ever taking the lives of other little children?

 

(Evangelist steps forward)

 

EVANGELIST

I think we all know the answer to that question, young lady! We have turned our backs on God! We have exiled him from our homes. We have expelled him from our schools. We have given him no say in our government! Oh, the hubris of man! We think that we have become enlightened, what with our Darwins and our internets, we have no need of God, and then look what happens! Atheism is responsible! What do you expect from a society that has rejected all spiritual values? As soon as these poor youths realize, I mean think, that they are completely free– oh completely free, I shudder at the thought! There’s no telling what evil they might feel is permissible knowing, I mean thinking, that there’s no God waiting to judge them.

 

(Narrator is going to speak, but College Student steps forward)

 

COLLEGE STUDENT


Yeah, but how can you say that when religion like spreads intolerance and stuff? Religious people just want to oppress everyone with their dogma. Religions have done all kinds of bad, intolerant things in the past. Think about the crusades, when Jesus went around killing all those Arabs. I mean, I know that was like almost a hundred years ago, but still! This country’s full of these Bible-thumping rednecks who are just narrow-minded and prejudiced. Especially in the South.

 

NARRATOR

Ladies and gentlemen, I submit to you: the decline of organized religion is responsible for the majority of the world’s problems. The survival of organized religion is responsible for the rest.

 

PLAYER 3

(stepping forward) Ok ok. But what I think we really need ask is, where are the parents in all this? I mean, really!

 

NARRATOR

Shut up.

 

(Lights crossfade. Boy and Girl enter and sit under the stars.)

 

GIRL

Do you believe in God?

 

BOY

I think so

 

(pause)

 

GIRL

What kind of God?

 

BOY

(considers) I don’t know.

 

(pause)

 

GIRL

They used to think all these stars were gods, you know.

 

BOY

Who did?

 

GIRL

You know. Ancient people. The Greeks, and probably Romans.

 

BOY

Oh.

 

GIRL


The constellations, they used to think, were all gods who’d been trapped up in the sky for one reason or another.

 

BOY

Who trapped them?

 

GIRL

Other gods. And then they had to stay there, fixed like that, for all eternity. And we can look at them and make up stories about them.

 

BOY

That one looks like a dinosaur.

 

GIRL

(Looking in the wrong place) A dinosaur?

 

BOY

No, that one.

 

GIRL

That one?

 

BOY

Yeah.

 

GIRL

(considers) Maybe a little.

 

(pause)

 

GIRL

It’s beautiful up here. Thank you for bringing me. Is this where you come? When you want to get away from it all?

 

BOY

Actually, you brought me here.

 

GIRL

Well, it doesn’t matter. It’s our spot now. A magical spot we can always escape to.

 

BOY

From the first second I saw you, I’ve wanted this. Now that I’m finally here, it doesn’t seem real.

 

GIRL

What was that?

 


BOY

(with difficulty) I think you’re amazing. I’ve never met anyone so unique and brilliant and gorgeous.

 

GIRL

I know. And I think I’m good enough for you.

 

(Boy is overwhelmed. Slowly, Boy and Girl bring their faces closer together...)

 

NARRATOR

How sweet. I can feel the tears welling up already. Next scene.

 

GIRL

What?

 

NARRATOR

Next scene. Hup hup hup. Gotta make these transitions crisp.

 

(Girl pulls out a script from her back pocket and flips to the appropriate page)

 

GIRL

But we’ve still got two more pages of dialogue.

 

NARRATOR

Yes, but it’s all more of the same syrup. Next scene! Cue lockers!

 

(Lights crossfade. Player 4 rolls in a set of lockers. Boy opens one and shuffles through his books. Jock enters and slams it shut.)

 

JOCK

Hey weirdo, done anything weird lately?

 

BOY

Leave me alone.

 

JOCK

Who was that chick you were talking to earlier? That your girlfriend?

 

BOY

I guess so.

 

JOCK

No shit. She is? Hey, she’s got a nice ass. How’d a wormy little cocklicker like you end up with such a fine rack of beef?

 


BOY

Because I’m not a fat, vulgar imbecile like you!

 

(Jock cannot believe what Boy has just said. A huge grin spreads across his face.)

 

JOCK

What’d you just call me? (laughs out loud) Hey, Conners, listen to what this faggot just called me?

 

(Jock 2 enters)

 

JOCK

He called me a fucking “imbecile”

 

(Jock and Jock 2 laugh uncontrollably.)

 

JOCK 2

(to Boy) Did you say that? (putting on a pretend monocle and adopting a stuffy British accent) My good man, your behavior is quite deplorable. Thou art nothing but an imbecile.

 

JOCK

Ha ha. “Imbecile”

 

JOCK 2

I dub thee imbecilic.

 

JOCK

What a fucking idiot. You seen this guy’s girlfriend, though? Fucking hot.

 

JOCK 2

Who is she?

 

JOCK

That one stuck-up bitch from Bio. The one that sits behind Marty.

 

(Boy tries to leave, but Jock stops him.)

 

JOCK

Where the fuck are you going? Don’t leave while we’re talking.

 

JOCK 2

Seriously, dude. That’s really fucking rude.

 

JOCK

I just wanted to ask you more about your girlfriend, that’s all. You fucked her yet?

 


BOY

No.

 

JOCK

No? Take my advice, bro. Next time you’re alone, when she’s not looking, PAH-POW! Finger up the cootch. She’ll love it.

 

JOCK 2

Hey, what’s her name again?

 

BOY

Shut up.

 

JOCK 2

What? I’m just asking her name. What’s her name?

 

BOY

I’ll fucking kill you.

 

(Jock and Jock 2 once more erupt in laughter)

 

JOCK 2

Come on, dude, don’t be an imbecile.

 

JOCK

Fuck with us, you’re asking for pain. (shoves Boy up against lockers) Come on, Conners, we got practice at 2.

 

JOCK 2

(to Boy) Don’t forget to tap that ass, Romeo.

 

(Jock and Jock 2 exit. Boy is left on stage to stew. Lights crossfade back to Narrator holding a Supersoaker watergun.)

 

NARRATOR

We’ll return to our young anti-social element and his wacky misadventures. For now, I’d like to take a break and discuss an issue of intense national controversy: gun control.

 

(On Narrator’s left approaches a mother cradling a baby doll. On Narrator’s right approaches a man with an eyepatch.)

 

MOTHER


This issue is so simple, it’s ridiculous. Guns are designed to kill people. Designed! They need to be outlawed right away. (holding out her child for all to see) I’m scared to think about the dangerous world my little baby’s going to grow up in. He could just be walking down the street, and there’s an assault rifle, laying on the ground ready to kill him. Kill! In this country, there are 50 gun related deaths every second. 50! In Europe and Japan, there’s only like a couple a year I think. And it’s because they have gun laws! This stupid country. When will we learn to be more like Europe in every way?

 

EYEPATCH

I’m afraid you’re just going about protecting your kid the wrong way, little lady. Sure, you can quote those gun death statistics til you’re blue in the face, but simple fact remains that guns save almost twice as many lives as they take away. All the liberal media will ever let you hear is all the bad things that guns do. And you know why? Because television audiences are thirsty for blood, and it’s way more exciting to see people getting shot by guns than people getting saved by guns. Furthermore, all those gun crimes are just committed by the bad guys, and the bad guys can get guns whether they’re legal or not, so there’s no point in making up silly little laws that just take guns away from the good guys. But no! Big Brother knows best! If they ban automatic weapons, what’s to prevent them from banning all other kinds of things that could potentially hurt people, like feet? Nothing! And they will too! Because the liberal elite is just handing this country over to the bad guys. We might as well just call this the United States of the Bad Guys or something like that. It makes me sick. The good guys need their guns and their feet to fight the bad guys. Everybody knows that.

 

NARRATOR

An intriguing debate. But does it have any relevance to our story? That remains to be seen.

 

(Lights crossfade. Boy and Girl again sit under the stars. Boy’s face is subtly bruised on one side.)

 

GIRL

Our dinosaur’s almost disappeared from the sky.

 

BOY

I can still see his tail, dipping down under the horizon.

 

GIRL

I thought that was his head.

 

BOY

No no. (takes Girl’s hand and uses it to trace the pattern of the constellation) There’s the tip, and see it curves up like that...

 

GIRL

Real dinosaurs didn’t drag their tails like that.

 

(Boy draws Girl’s hand close to his face and kisses it gently. They stare into each other’s eyes. Girl notices the bruise and touches it gingerly.)

 


GIRL

Is this new?

 

BOY

Earlier today.

 

GIRL

Again? Those fucking barbarians. What happened?

 

BOY

I threw a rock at his car.

 

GIRL

A big rock?

 

(Boy shrugs.)

 

GIRL

Well, you probably shouldn’t intentionally provoke them like that, but I’m proud of you for standing up for yourself anyway.

 

BOY

I have to talk to the counselor again tomorrow.

 

GIRL

For the rock?

 

BOY

No. Unrelated incident. I told this guy in gym class that I was going to jab a knife through his spine.

 

GIRL

Oh. (pause) Do you think you could ever actually do something like that?

 

BOY

Probably not.

 

(pause)

 

GIRL

But do you think, if you ever decided that you didn’t care anymore, didn’t care about living or what happened next, do you think maybe you’d want to– I mean, consequences don’t matter anymore– would you try to hurt some of them? As like your last act. The only thing meaningful you’ll ever do. Would you try to just pay some of them back?

 


BOY

Pay who back?

 

GIRL

You know who I’m talking about. All those guys who have made your life miserable over the years. You know. The bad guys.

 

BOY

If I didn’t have to worry about what happened next? Yeah, I guess so.

 

GIRL

I’d like to be there to see that.-- Is that a shooting star?

 

BOY

Where? I didn’t see.

 

GIRL

I should have made a wish.

 

BOY

What would you wish for?

 

(They clasp hands.)

 

GIRL

For this moment to last forever.

 

NARRATOR

Ugh. It already feels like it is. Get to the point.

 

(Girl and Boy both break character and express frustration at having their moment broken. Girl rolls her eyes and pulls out her script.)

 

GIRL

Where should we take it from?

 

NARRATOR

From your proposition. Right before the end of the scene.

 

GIRL

Fine. (putting away her script and reciting the lines melodramatically, still out of character) Meet me here tomorrow night. We’ll run away together.

 

NARRATOR

Stop! Act it right or don’t act it at all.


GIRL

(once more giving as real and heartfelt a performance as the actor can muster) Meet me here tomorrow night. We’ll run away together. We’ll go to some town where we don’t know anyone, and all we’ll have is each other.

 

BOY

And maybe we’ll be happy?

 

GIRL

Most of the time.

 

BOY

I’ll be here.

 

(Lights crossfade. Narrator addresses the audience, accompanied by Mother, Expert 2, Evangelist and Eyepatch.)

 

NARRATOR

Enough talk, my friends! Enough euphemisms and theories. The problem is at our doorstep. We have but one simple dilemma: how are we going to keep are kids from being shot to death in school?

 

MOTHER

Metal detectors in every classroom! Bullet-proof school uniforms! Huge concrete walls surrounding the premises and barbed wire everywhere. Anything to keep our little treasures safe!

 

EXPERT 2

I propose that we implement a more aggressive program of assemblies. We keep the kids in the auditorium 24/7. I mean, who ever heard of anyone getting shot at an assembly?

 

EVANGELIST

We need the ten commandments up in every classroom. From preschool to highschool. I’m confident that any would-be shooter is gonna think twice when he sees, “Thou Shalt Not Kill” up there on the wall. That’s God’s law up there!

 

EYEPATCH

What we need is armed guards. Schools can’t keep children safe if they’re being outgunned! All you need is 3 or 4 security men per campus packing heat, and I swear, next time there’s a problem, you’ll be sure to keep your body count low.

 

NARRATOR

These measures may seem harsh, but what we need now is solutions. (to audience) Do you have a better one?

 

(Lights crossfade. Player 1 wheels on the lockers. Boy enters carrying a paper sack. He looks around nervously and opens his locker. Jock and Jock 2 enter, talking.)

 


JOCK

So what happened to all the metal detectors?

 

JOCK 2

Bulletproof uniforms kept setting them off, I guess.

 

JOCK

Like anyone actually wore them. (to Boy) Hey, asswipe, feel like removing anything from your rectum? I’ve got a pencil here with your name on it.

 

BOY

Go fuck yourself. I’m not afraid of you.

 

(Jock and Jock 2 laugh)

 

JOCK 2

“I am not afraid of you, good sir.” How gallant.

 

JOCK

You need to start showing some more respect, little man.

 

(Boy reaches into his paper bag, looks around, and points the object inside at Jock. It is still concealed by the bag.)

 

BOY

I’m giving you one last chance to say you’re sorry.

 

JOCK

What the fuck?

 

JOCK 2

Oh shit. You can’t be serious.

 

JOCK

This little prick doesn’t have shit. Do you, you little cocklicker?

 

BOY

Bet your life on it?

 

JOCK 2

Fuck. He’s got a gun. He’s got a gun!

 

BOY

Shut up! Stay calm!

 


(There is a commotion heard offstage that grows louder. “A gun?” “Who?” “Over there!” “Tell someone.” etc.)

 

JOCK 2

Help! Help! He’s got a gun!

 

JOCK

(overlapping) He doesn’t have a gun.

 

BOY

(overlapping) Shut up! I swear I’ll fucking kill you if you keep shouting!

 

(Suddenly, an alarm goes off and the lights start flashing. All three boys continue shouting. The stage has descended into cacophony and confusion.)

 

VOICE (O.S.)

Drop it!

 

BOY

Who the fuck said that? I’ll kill you!

 

VOICE

I said drop it!

 

(A shot rings out. Silence. Boy drops to the floor. The Narrator and all actors, except Player 6, gather around his body. Narrator lifts Boy’s arm and removes the paper bag from the object he’s holding to reveal a banana to the audience. Narrator nods, and they begin to carry his body, still clutching the banana, offstage.)

 

(Lights slowly crossfade and Girl sits under the stars, alone. She hangs her head and weeps. Reclaiming her composure, she looks up at the stars angrily, then despairingly. She takes out a cigarette and lights it. After one puff, she holds it out and stares at the burning ember on the end.)

 

NARRATOR

(authoritatively) That’s enough.

 

(Girl lifts up her sleeve and savagely jabs the cigarette into her forearm.)

 

NARRATOR

I said that’s enough!

 

(Girl manages to keep the burning tip pressed against her skin for a full second, after which she violently pulls the cigarette away and desperately nurses her wound. Boy enters and walks up behind her.)

 

BOY


Did you hurt yourself?

 

GIRL

Oh my god. Oh my god! (leaping to her feet and throwing her arms around him) I thought you were dead!

 

(Boy looks at her sadly.)

 

BOY

I am.

 

NARRATOR

Stop! This never happened.

 

GIRL

There’s so many things I want to say to you.

 

BOY

I don’t have much time.

 

NARRATOR

Scene.

 

GIRL

Can I touch you?

 

(He takes both her hands.)

 

NARRATOR

Scene!

 

GIRL

Why isn’t there room in the world for happiness?

 

BOY

Don’t cry. We’ll always have this. Right here right now. No one can take that away.

 

(Narrator interrupts, violently coming between them.)

 

NARRATOR

That’s enough, god damn it! Scene!(Boy and Girl part and break character) This didn’t happen. Can the ghost story nonsense and stick to the story you’re given.

 

BOY

But--

 

 

NARRATOR


This is my god damn show! (turning to walk away) Next scene.

 

GIRL

We’re tired of this shit. If you want to rant and rave, go ahead and buy yourself a soapbox. This whole thing is just passive aggressive bullshit (throws script at Narrator). Tell your own god damn story. (exits)

 

BOY

(shrugs) Sorry. (exits)

 

(Narrator looks around, embarrassed.)

 

NARRATOR

(to audience) Well, uh, looks like– (notices she’s in the wrong light cue, to booth) lights?

 

(Lights crossfade.)

 

NARRATOR

Well, it looks like we’ve come to the end of our evening here. I hope you’ve enjoyed, “Discourse on Youth Violence in America,” and that you will continue to think critically about the problems that face our nation.

 

(She freezes. Hoping for help, she looks offstage. She turns back, lost in thought. Slowly, she pulls up the sleeve of her trenchcoat to reveal a circular scar on her forearm. She caresses it gently. She looks back up and meets the audience’s gaze. A look of hatred spreads across her face. She turns and flees from the room. Blackout.)